Last week I turned 29. Wasn’t I 25 yesterday? In all
honesty, I really have no desire to be 25, or even 21 again, but 27 is another
story. Although it may feel like I
was just 25 yesterday, when I really think back to my late college self, I
realize just how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned about relationships,
myself, and life in general. Here
are the 29 most important things I know now at 29.
1. What you put in your body is
important. I weigh my options when I'm looking at food. I buy only brown
cage-free eggs now, I prefer my beef to be grass-fed, and I do appreciate
organic and GMO-free options. I simply can't eat what I ate when I was
21.
2. Friendships change. In my
mid 20's and even a couple years ago, this was very hard to accept. I
struggled to hold onto relationships that were over and resisted change with
others. I've come to realize that some friendships are toxic, some have
run their course but will always hold a special place in my heart, and others
are unconventional but just work.
3. It's great to have someone
cheering for you in your corner, but nothing shows true friends more than when
hard times hit. These are the times that make or break many friendships,
but it's like weeding out a garden. The friends left are the ones who
stick around for the cold, the freezes, the harsh winds, and the days after.
4. Parents are people too. They
were people before me and were once the young couple with their whole lives
before them. They don't know everything but their advice is priceless,
even when I don't listen.
5. Wine and dark chocolate should be
considered staples.
6. Medical stuff can be the scariest thing on earth. I'm terrified of sharks but nothing is
quite as terrifying as medical related things. Hearing the word
"cancer", among other scary medical conditions, in any sentence directed
at you or someone you love in a doctor's office is scary as hell.
7. Opinions change. Things I thought were horrible 5 years
ago don't seem so horrible now. Everyone has their own method of
parenting, dealing with relationship issues, and life views, and that’s
ok. Diversity is what keeps things
interesting.
8. Plans change. The straight
line that was going to me from point A in my life to point B now looks like a 2
year old's drawing of a tornado on a line graph. Detours happen, but
these detours can be some of the best thing; things we didn't even know we
wanted.
9. People who are dragging you down
because of their negative attitude, gossip, or meanness, aren't worth your
time. Usually they're unhappy with themselves and taking it out on
everyone else. Move on; there are a lot of amazing people out there!
10. Big things are important in a
marriage/relationship, but the little things are just as important
sometimes. Sometimes a small, thoughtful gesture says more than an
over-the-top one ever could.
11. Morals matter more than
money. When I was younger I remember telling my dad that I just wanted a
job I was happy with. He argued that I'd want a job I could make money
with. It turns out we were both right. I had 3 job offers a month
or so after graduating and I took the one that paid the best. After a
month I left because I couldn't stand the lack of business morals. I ended
up in the low paying job with people I loved and an environment that fit my
values. Money is important, but it’s never worth selling out if you’re
unhappy or compromising your values.
12. Everyone is dealing with
something, whether they talk about it or not. Cut them some slack,
understand that they may have more going on than you could ever imagine, and
let it go (I hear the frozen song in my head everytime I type/say that...).
13. Exercising really can be fun, or
at least not horrible. I never
thought I'd get there, but I actually enjoy working out. I mostly love
the feeling after and knowing I'm doing something great for myself. I
learned what I like and I’ve finally stopped trying to be a gym person. It’s just not for me.
14. Be yourself. At this time
in my life I have a pretty good idea of who I am and who I'm not. I have
strong values. I know what kind of music I like, the food I prefer, and
the kinds of people I want around me.
I’ve wished I was another kind of person at times, but I am who I am and
I’m pretty happy with that.
15. Don't be afraid to fail. I
took a job for which I wasn't prepared, didn't get the training/support I was
assured I'd have, and realized quickly that I had taken the job for the wrong
reasons. I remember talking to my mom when I told her I was going to quit
and she expressed worry that I'd regret it. I quit the job after less
than a week (yes, it was that bad, and I don’t quit jobs easily) and have no
regrets. Sometimes you have to just accept that something didn't work,
learn the lesson, and move on.
16. Sometimes you just need to say no
and that's okay. Most of the time, no explanation is necessary.
17. You can't expect people to read
your mind. When I was little I wanted a pink convertible for my barbies
so badly. I asked Santa for it 3 years in a row, and finally during the
third year I complained to my mom that Santa just wasn't doing his job very
well. I finally received that long awaited toy that third year.
It's hard to expect people to read your mind, and it’s certainly not fair to be
mad when that doesn’t happen.
18. God does have a plan.
Sometimes it feels like everything is falling apart, but we only see the little
bit in front of us whereas God sees everything. So many times I've been
upset because something didn't work only to find out later (sometimes years
later) that I dodged a bullet.
19. Change is easier in some ways,
harder in others, and completely inevitable.
20. If something about someone else
annoys you, you're probably annoyed because you dislike that quality in
yourself.
21. In general, things are not as
difficult as they seem.
Usually the hardest step is the first.
22. People will always ask intrusive
questions. Handle them with tact and try not to turn into one of those
people asking the intrusive questions.
23. Driving across the country
without stopping is not as easy as it was 5 years ago.
24. It’s important to pick your
battles and sometimes that means letting the little things go.
25. Surroundings have a profound
impact on attitude and happiness. I'm talking about the aesthetic things;
textures, colors, smells, light, etc. I'm so much happier when I'm
surrounded by pretty things and it's hard for me to think when things around me
are messy or dirty.
26. Whoever determined the recommended
8-9 hours of sleep was onto something.
I’m not quite sure how to make that happen along with working, cooking, laundry,
and life, but it’s a great feeling when it works out.
27. You can handle more than you think. It's shocking what you can do when you
have to. I look back on things now, some minor, and some major, and
wonder how I got through that time in my life. Usually it was a combination of supportive friends and
family, my family, positive thinking, and determination.
28. Sometimes you just need to fall apart. Life can be hard. Bad things happen; people get sick,
finances are tight, people die, and there have been times I wanted to curl up
in a ball and hide out until things got better. It’s okay to fall apart now and then and sometimes it’s very
necessary. Take a breath and
remember that things will get better.
29. There will always be something to
do, but sometimes it's best to make the decision to forget it all for awhile
and have some fun. Some of my best
memories involve silly, stupid moments.
Age is just a number (to an
extent). I thought I’d have it all
together by this point, but that’s not quite how things work. I don’t have everything together, but I’m
figuring it out as I go and I think I’m doing alright. There’s no magical age that everything
clicks (or so I’ve heard) and I imagine that when I’m 39 I’ll still be trying
to figure everything out, but that’s okay.
